Inside My Arms.

Amazing to think I haven't updated since summer break, when I'm now almost finished with my first semester of college. Flagstaff is beautiful and my routine had changed, but I can't sing Matt Nathanson to this kind of lifestyle. In other words, deep down in my soul, I'm unhappy. It seems like there's no happy middle for me; I want the things I loved about Tucson back, but I also don't want to feel trapped anywhere. However, here in college, I'm being denied the first and experiencing the second. I'm sacrificing more than I was to begin with. I wish I wasn't such a confused individual; do I want to stick to the notion of 'home', or abandon it for the big, wide world? Do I want to stay close to the people I love or be able to turn my shoulder and pass the new faces without a care? So dramatic, isn't it?

I'm going to be nineteen in a couple of hours.

Made for Glory by Landon Pigg
Wasted Time by Me'Shell D'Negeocello
Slow Dancing In A Burning Room by John Mayer
No Bravery by James Blunt
Winter Song by Sara Bareilles ft. Ingrid Michaelson

And when I wake sometime in June, I'll say.

Wow, so much time has passed since my last update. Summer has distracted me as thoroughly as it usually does, and I'm enjoying that fact immensely, even as I type it out right now. I've graduated from high school, attended an awesome grad night and grad party, then gone to Disneyland, college orientation in Flagstaff, and most recently to New York. I'd say my agenda has been pretty full, just the way I like it. I'll slap some pictures onto the end of this entry of some of the events I just mentioned.

Some more recent updates in my life are my new knack for scrapbooking, my continual hate/hate relationship with my treadmill and yoga mat, and a family of fifteen to twenty ground squirrels living in a hole outside my window. I've been able to swim on several occasions since summer began, and actually quite like this year's swimsuit choice; a blue frilly bikini from Victoria's Secret Pink... ahem. I've downloaded a lot of new songs, some of which I'm a bit guilty for liking. My friends and I have been hanging out non-stop. Monsoons are here.

Overall, I'd have to say that life is good. I love you too, summer.

And it changed.

Songs everyone should hear, at least once.
By Allie.

Here With Me by Dido
When You Were Young by The Killers
Dancing by Elisa
In The Summertime by Thirsty Merc
Brothers On A Hotel Bed by Death Cab For Cutie
The Moon by The Swell Season
Mary Jane by Alanis Morissette
She Talks To Angels by Black Crowes
Honey And The Moon by Joseph Arthur
Your Heart Is An Empty Room by Death Cab For Cutie
Drought by Vienna Teng
Scherzo-Tarantelle (Op 16) by Henryk Wieniawski
Sanctuary by Utada Hikaru
Then I'll Be Smiling by Matt Nathanson
Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright
The opening theme to JJ Abrams "Fringe"
Between by Vienna Teng
Do What You Have To Do by Sarah McLachlan
Summer Skin by Death Cab For Cutie
Don't Know When But A Day's Gonna Come by Bright Eyes
Burnin' For You by Blue Oyster Cult
The World You Love by Jimmy Eat World
Come Around Again by JET
You Could Be Happy by Snow Patrol
In My Head by Anna Nalick
Drops Of Jupiter by Train
Here's To Life by Streetlight Manifesto
In The Fade by Queens Of The Stone Age
Fix You by Coldplay
Layla by Cream
Don't Panic by Coldplay
Don't Leave Home by Dido
No Lies, Just Love by Bright Eyes
Car Crash by Matt Nathanson
Now Comest The Night by Rob Thomas
Rose by The Feeling
Where I Stood by Missy Higgins
Hey Ya by Obadiah Parker
On Your Porch by The Format
Audivi Vocem by Paul Hillier (choral)
Crazy Circles by Bad Company
Southern Girl by Incubus
Suddenly I See by KT Tunstall
Boston by Augustana
White Flag by Dido
Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls
Collide by Howie Day
Dig by Incubus
Universe & U by KT Tunstall
In My Arms by Plumb
Tell Me Baby by Red Hot Chili Peppers
Flames by Vast
Now Three by Vienna Teng

Warm.

I have been so happy lately, it's ridiculous.
It's the "second semester of my last year" high. It also happened in fifth and eighth grade, but not this powerfully. I feel elated. Usually it's so hard for me to keep my head above water with school and life, but now, it's like I'm on completely dry land, and I love it.
I'm enjoying every second of Cienega's school musical, "Into The Woods", and my friends and I are closer than we have been since Freshman year. Sometimes it only takes one stupid video game to remind you of why you are friends and how much you have in common. We've hung out every weekend since winter break ended. I can't believe how thankful I am.
Art and inspiration have returned, and though the weather's been a bit too cold, I'm just turning my eyes towards spring and summer.

Merry Christmas.

Holiday.

A substantial amount has happened between now and November 26, my last entry. I'm very excited to announce, first and foremost, that I'm the proud aunt to TWO adorable nieces. Cherry Ligeia Genovese was born on the twelve of December, around three in the morning. Below is a picture taken by Hudson, their Dad, of the sisters.











Cherry Ligeia and Harley Kavita!

Moving on, I'm currently in the middle of renovating my room; new wall color, shifting furniture, a whole new look. It hasn't been changed since middle school, which was during my awkward, rebellious phase when I only wore boy's clothes and never brushed my hair. I think it fit to move out of that stage of life and into my current place of existence. My room is going to be ANTIQUE VICTORIAN!
Ta-daaa...!
Or, at least, that's what I'm going for. I just love the time period, and want to try and style my room to fit that theme.

I'm very excited for Christmas this year, in a way I haven't been excited since I was little. I decorated several weeks early, and bought two tons of candy to litter around the house in small, festive bowls. My only grievance is that I already know pretty much everything I'm getting this year... it just turned out that way. In the end, I don't really care; I'm just happy I get to feel like I'm six again and know that I'm still going to get everyone up at five in the morning to open gifts.

Last night my family and our friends went on the Winter Haven hayride, which is basically the closest thing Tucson has to Christmas cheer; everyone packs onto a wagon full of hay (which is really scary because who knows what kind of worms and mites live in that crap) that is pulled by two very large horses with poop bags strapped to their rears. The wagon ride then goes through a neighborhood that is decorated to the point of insanity, including light displays that would probably send Al Gore into a cardiac arrest. It is a constantly smelly experience, but I love it and have gone on it every year since I started high school. Out of all the things it brings me, most of all it's thankfulness. I realize through my brother's, Atish Mazumdar's, Mr. Dykeman's, and my own sardonic commentary of the houses how much I truely love my friends and my family. Conversations about 'the AIDS house', the gutting and skinning of reindeer, and the forced re-education of small children will always prove to me how great life is with these people.

As a closing, I think I've eaten my own weight in cookies.

It's raining today and it's freezing the way winter should be freezing and it's beautiful.
Also, I guess the boy got tired of me.

Wintercats.